Saying goodbye,

Pop's funeral is on Saturday but travel will have to be made on Friday as no flight gets in early enough.

Tracy and I had blood tests on Wednesday as we entered the second year of IVF with our current clinic and her's were 'inconclusive' and as we are very committed to this course they want her to have another on Friday so I will travel home by myself.

There are two grandson's, myself as first grandchild and my cousin and fourth born Marshall. Uncle Peter has asked if we may be able to talk at the service. I'm not unknown as a public speaker but this is not one I look forward to.

I know that my exposure to death and more so when it is in the home and with the family, you as the ambo are often all the support that family and friends have as is first sinks in. But this is my Pop and I'm not sure what I feel.

I know that emotion is never a fixed thing, it changes and alters as your exposure and environment changes, ask any military man who has returned from a war zone. I know that it is normal to outlive your parents and grandparents and while I know and understand Pops underlying illnesses and their associated pathways and complications I am left some what hollow.

Coming so recently after Nan's death I guess that it is just a combination.

The image at the start of the post is something that Tracy put together. All the artwork has been created by her own hand, none of it is a fancy computer program, she now creates this stuff, script, texture and colour even the flowers from scratch. If your interested in this scrapbook stuff zip over to her blog Ambowife Designs up in the links

Be careful out there and I'll see you at the Big One.

Taz